Monday, August 8, 2011

08 August, 2011

WOW!!!! I can't believe that I haven't blogged in so long. 

Well, I guess I should catch everybody up with what's going on.... I've been in TX 7 months now. Starting size: 23/24, current size 14, and I can't put into words how proud I am of myself, even though, I can't see what others see. MAN, I wish I could! I'm working on that though. I'm over at Round Rock HS (yup, my old stomping grounds), working with the Marine Corps Junior ROTC program... Let me tell ya', I'm so blessed to be around these kids. They really make my day, even if they annoy me some times, they're all like my little brothers and sisters. They've seriously done wonders for my esteem. Over the summer, we went to Harlengen, TX to an MMA camp which was amazing and awesome, and I really got to know the cadets better. We also had camps for the incoming MCJROTC cadets (fish camp), and just finished a Cadet SNCO camp which wasn't too bad. This week, until the 19th, we have a Cadet Officer camp going on, so we'll (SgtMaj Martinez, Major Shimp, as well as myself) see who's cut out and prepared to take on the roll as a Cadet Officer. I really don't know where I'd be without this opportunity to teach these students everything I have learned. It really makes me say "I love this", every day. Even on the bad days. And for that, I truly do owe a "thanks" to SgtMaj Martinez for giving me a chance. Unfortunately, as some of you know through my Facebook postings, this summer, we lost one of our Cadets, Alex Diaz. I'm not gonna sit here and lie; as many students feel, I still miss him very much. There are still times where I have a random fit of anger because I just can't understand. Yes, maybe I should let go, but it takes longer for me. It's hard to let go of those who have truly touched me. Diaz was one of the first students who made SURE I knew who he was. He actually helped me transition from Marine to teacher. Not in a physical sense, but in the way that I should see things from the Cadet's point of view, rather than just the Marine's side, which I was so used to after so long. He was an incredible young man, amazing student, and I'm sure nobody will forget him, for those who were truly touched by him. 

Also, the tragic death of "Stef" Saldari.... He was a Marine I knew from Camp Lejeune, as did my many friends back on the East Coast. It was a total shock, and there's a part of me who still can't believe it. I only wish I could have made the service, and I still pray for comfort to his family.

But on another note, I'm planning on going to school in the Spring of 2012 (January) to begin the road of completing my degree (bachelors of science, kinesiology/sports medicine), as well as receive my personal trainer's certification. I'm still working on my weight loss, but not going as crazy due to over training, as well as my injuries flaring up when I push WAY too far. I'm hoping that my students can learn from me, somehow. Whether it be diets, lifestyles, workouts, or life lessons. As for my personal life, I'm choosing to keep that personal for now. If you want to know about it, you can email or text me about it, but for the time being, I prefer not to post it all up on here. Sorry. Yes, still working on saving $ for a place, but looks like it'll be longer than I thought, because it sucks being an adult lol. No, seriously, I'm working on my financial issues, and it's taking a lot A LOT longer than I thought. UGH. One day at a time, Janna....One day at a time. I'll figure it out. I always do. I find out on 15DEC2011 if I'm eligible for the USMC reserves/ Army/ TX Nat'l Guard...You see, being a temp. medical retiree, they basically take you off the "active" radar until you're cleared by your VA docs. Then once you're "good-to-go", they put your name back out there, and you keep doin' your thing, in the Reserves, or branching over.

Well guys 'n' gals, I'm sure I'll have more on my mind later on, but I'm gonna go ahead and close this, with a question, "What kind of impact do you think you've left with your friends? If today was your last day, how would they remember you? A hero? A mentor? Someone who always played it safe?"

I don't know about all of you, but I hope that my friends etc., have seen me as support. As having faith in each in every one of you, and wanting you to strive for so much more, and becoming more than you could ever imagine. That I love each and every one of you; for your imperfections, for your flaws, for your hearts, your laughs & tears, and for having courage in yourself to be who you truly are... Never be afraid to ask for that crying shoulder. Everybody is a hero in their own way. You just have to know in your heart, where your place is.

Trust yourself. Be brave. Live. Laugh. Cry. Believe.